048: Sometimes all you need is a little fresh air.

Well blogosphere, it's been a while. I'm not going to lie, Ive thought about discontinuing this blog altogether. It just seems as though it was a security blanket while starting this journey that, at least at the present, I feel like I don't need anymore.

I mean, there are still tough days, but right now I'm riding the crest of a wave. I went on vacation to new york this weekend, herbalife in my luggage. I visited with a really truly supportive close friend, who really kept me on track for the whole three days. We ate salads, we walked about a thousand miles. (Started at Penn Station, ended up on Bleeker Street).

But moreover, I think this is just what I needed to clear my head and get out of this funk I've been in. There's something about new york. I just sort of feel like I'm more myself when I'm there, you know? Or maybe, more of the myself I'd like to be.

Usually I spend a ton of money on these trips so I can't really afford to go often. But since I didn't go out to eat pretty much the whole time, I actually saved a lot of money, which was nice. I also did some busking. Busking is when you play music in a public place in the hopes that tourists and passersby will give you money. There's also a pretty good chance you could get heckled.

This is not something I think I would have had the confidence to attempt a few months ago. But I have this newfound energy. These newfound guts. So I tried it. And nobody heckled. And I made 15 dollars. And Shayna says this adorable boy who was eating his lunch by the fountain hit on me. But I'm pretty sure he was just asking me about some of my equipment. I'm still pretty oblivious to stuff like that. I was pretty sure he was hitting on her. It's going to be an adjustment to see myself as something othe than the DUFF.

I spent the rest of the time wandering around old stomping grounds and letting some of that magic set in. Then I drove home. I pretty much spent all of monday by myself, which was good too. Alone with my thoughts, letting the new york magic slowly leave me.

So I arrived back in Rhode Island pretty rejuvenated. I went to get some pants, and found out that I'm actually down 2 pants sizes. I then proceded to buy an exorbitant amount of clothes because, hello, that's effing awesome. I'm officially skinnier than I have been in like 10 years.  I'm a size 14. And while I still have a way to go, I'm officially in the realm of normal chubby. And that is an awesome feeling.

It is such an awesome feeling, in fact, that I dont feel the need to cheat on my diet anymore. I actually am relishing that hungry feeling, and that feeling that comes with eating healthy and sweating my butt off.

And just like that magic feeling I get in new york, I'm sure this feeling won't last. But I'm reveling in it while I can.