Weigh and measure time, kids!
So, as I expected, I didn't lose as much as I've lost in the last 3 weeks. However, I was just hoping to maintain and not gain. I am pleased to report that I lost 3 pounds! Also, which is both perplexing and amazing, I lost another 7.4 inches off my body. That brings the total to 23 pounds and 20.4 inches lost so far. Which is pretty good for a month, if you ask me. :) Especially when you consider that my goal was to lose 10 lbs a month, and I more than doubled that this month. You can't lose 7 pounds every week. Eventually, your body will need time to catch up.
Today Josh also asked if I would be interested in someday becoming a coach today at our meeting. I am definitely thinking about it. I don't think I know even close to enough to help someone lose weight yet, but hopefully, by the time I am 97 lbs skinnier, I will. I am learning something new every single day, so it is entirely possible.
One thing I WOULD like to learn (and again I'm going to reach out to all of you who might be reading this) is what the EFF to do to lose the paunch around my lower abs. I am watching everything else literally melt away, and this annoying like pocket of fat is just there to stay. I do upwards of 500 crunches daily. There's gotta be a six pack under there somewhere, but how do I get rid of the stuff on top? I am open to suggestions!
Yesterday night I went dress shopping with my mom. I'm officially down a dress size and then some. I got the cutest dress and sweater to wear to the bridal shower next weekend. Then I went to the carnival at the end of our street with my roommate. I spent all my money on games (rides were already closed down) and did not buy a single slushie or fried oreo. And I was pretty proud of that.
Today I get to hang out with the best little sister ever, and then go and celebrate my dad's birthday. Then starts the hellatious week from hell. Wish me luck, and expect tired/cranky entries to follow. For that, I am sorry!
And for those of you keeping track:
Week 5!!! 237 lbs
Breakfast: oreo herbalife shake w/chocolate protein
Lunch: oreo herbalife shake w/chocolate protein
Snack 1: 100 calorie bag of popcorn
Snack 2: 1 rice cake/1 plum
Dinner: 1 bowl of cheerios in 1 cup skim milk, 1 peach
Also 3 multivitamins, 2 cell activators, and 4 80z glasses of water (I am all out of green tea!)
Showing posts with label shopping. Show all posts
Showing posts with label shopping. Show all posts
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Sunday, April 1, 2012
013: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder (and other lies we tell ourselves)
Hey all! So my final weigh in for this week has me losing 4 total inches off my various body areas, and 7 pounds total. This brings my weight to 147 (13 pounds total weight loss so far)
Hell fucking yeah.
I had a great workout this morning and then went to my meeting with josh for weigh and measure. He was pretty pleased, as was I. He even suggested that my metabolism would benefit from one cheat meal a week, as long as the portions are small. I've decided that meal will be mondays (since it gives me the most time to make up for it before the next weigh and measure).
You know what that means?
Pizza tomorrow.
I could do a happy dance. I know, it's sad to be that elated about pizza, but I am. And it's approved my nutrition coach so I dont even have to feel that badly about it!
Another thing happened during my weigh and measure. We were talking about my music ( http://www.reverbnation.com/ ) and how body image factors into that. And he said that, you know, whatever weight I'm at, I'm beautiful. I said thanks, and he raised an eyebrow.
"You know how beautiful you are, right?" He said.
Now. Don't get all up in arms. Josh is ubergay. He was simply stating his opinion. But the truth is, I don't know that. I haven't known or felt that I was pretty in a very, very long time, if ever. Because even when I was young an skinnier (a size 8/10 and biking 14 miles daily) I wanted to be thinner. I wanted to be a size zero. And sure, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but personally I think that is bullshit. People have told me I'm pretty. Not many, but some. And it has never mattered. I always figure they are just being nice or polite or trying to get something from me. And that's because, if YOU don't know you're beautiful, it doesnt matter what the beholder thinks.
And furthermore, we put SO much emphasis on body size when we are assessing beauty. The girl that lives next door to my roommate and I once said a girl was so fat (And I saw this girl, by the way, she was maybe 1 or 2 sizes bigger than me) that it was hard to look at her.
How can anyone feel beautiful when they are invisible to the people around them, when people actually avoid looking at them?
And clothes shopping! Something I have dreaded since I was eleven. How the hell can you feel beautiful when you have to go to a "specialty" store (and pay 5 times what the same dress costs at a normal store) because none of the regular stores have your size?
Skinny people will never know how horrible this feels. How plus size women, even women like me who LOVE clothes will avoid mall trips, especially with skinny friends. You know what I do when I go into a normal store like Forever 21 with my roommate? I make a bee-line for the accssories. Scarves, hats, jewelry, purses. Things like that. I convinced myself I would rather shop for those things because I then didn't have to face the depressing reality that if I DID want to buy a dress in this store, I couldn't. Because it wouldn't fit me. So my friends are all happily trying on adorable sundresses and tops that I desperately want to wear, and I am wandering around the accessories and checking my watch and countingthe seconds til it is over and we can go somewhere where I am not as glaringly unattractive.
How can anyone feel pretty in that situation? It's like being slapped in the face by society with the knowledge that You don't look like what regular people are supposed to look like. You need to change.
And yeah. I'm changing. And while I am partly doing it because you can only fight these situations for so long before you have to play ball, I am also doing it for myself.
Because I want so badly to feel beautiful. Even if it's just once.
...Who doesn't?
Week 3: 247 lbs
Breakfast: herbalife shake w/protein powder in water, green tea
Lunch: herbalife shake w/protein powder in water, green tea
Snack: 1/4 cup strawberries
Dinner: 1 small pork chop, 1 cucumber
Also: 8 8oz glasses of water, 3 multivitamins, 2 cell activators
Excercise: Ran 4.5 miles, 300 crunches, various arm and leg weight/resistance excercises
Hell fucking yeah.
I had a great workout this morning and then went to my meeting with josh for weigh and measure. He was pretty pleased, as was I. He even suggested that my metabolism would benefit from one cheat meal a week, as long as the portions are small. I've decided that meal will be mondays (since it gives me the most time to make up for it before the next weigh and measure).
You know what that means?
Pizza tomorrow.
I could do a happy dance. I know, it's sad to be that elated about pizza, but I am. And it's approved my nutrition coach so I dont even have to feel that badly about it!
Another thing happened during my weigh and measure. We were talking about my music ( http://www.reverbnation.com/ ) and how body image factors into that. And he said that, you know, whatever weight I'm at, I'm beautiful. I said thanks, and he raised an eyebrow.
"You know how beautiful you are, right?" He said.
Now. Don't get all up in arms. Josh is ubergay. He was simply stating his opinion. But the truth is, I don't know that. I haven't known or felt that I was pretty in a very, very long time, if ever. Because even when I was young an skinnier (a size 8/10 and biking 14 miles daily) I wanted to be thinner. I wanted to be a size zero. And sure, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but personally I think that is bullshit. People have told me I'm pretty. Not many, but some. And it has never mattered. I always figure they are just being nice or polite or trying to get something from me. And that's because, if YOU don't know you're beautiful, it doesnt matter what the beholder thinks.
And furthermore, we put SO much emphasis on body size when we are assessing beauty. The girl that lives next door to my roommate and I once said a girl was so fat (And I saw this girl, by the way, she was maybe 1 or 2 sizes bigger than me) that it was hard to look at her.
How can anyone feel beautiful when they are invisible to the people around them, when people actually avoid looking at them?
And clothes shopping! Something I have dreaded since I was eleven. How the hell can you feel beautiful when you have to go to a "specialty" store (and pay 5 times what the same dress costs at a normal store) because none of the regular stores have your size?
Skinny people will never know how horrible this feels. How plus size women, even women like me who LOVE clothes will avoid mall trips, especially with skinny friends. You know what I do when I go into a normal store like Forever 21 with my roommate? I make a bee-line for the accssories. Scarves, hats, jewelry, purses. Things like that. I convinced myself I would rather shop for those things because I then didn't have to face the depressing reality that if I DID want to buy a dress in this store, I couldn't. Because it wouldn't fit me. So my friends are all happily trying on adorable sundresses and tops that I desperately want to wear, and I am wandering around the accessories and checking my watch and countingthe seconds til it is over and we can go somewhere where I am not as glaringly unattractive.
How can anyone feel pretty in that situation? It's like being slapped in the face by society with the knowledge that You don't look like what regular people are supposed to look like. You need to change.
And so, when someone doesn't feel like that. When they think you are perfect the way you are, it is hard to believe they are sincere or serious when you have all this empirical evidence to the contrary.
Anyway.And yeah. I'm changing. And while I am partly doing it because you can only fight these situations for so long before you have to play ball, I am also doing it for myself.
Because I want so badly to feel beautiful. Even if it's just once.
...Who doesn't?
Week 3: 247 lbs
Breakfast: herbalife shake w/protein powder in water, green tea
Lunch: herbalife shake w/protein powder in water, green tea
Snack: 1/4 cup strawberries
Dinner: 1 small pork chop, 1 cucumber
Also: 8 8oz glasses of water, 3 multivitamins, 2 cell activators
Excercise: Ran 4.5 miles, 300 crunches, various arm and leg weight/resistance excercises
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